Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Pipe specifications


1. All pipe is to be made of a long hole, surrounded by metal or plastic centered around the hole.

2. All pipe is to be hollow throughout the entire length do not install or place into service holes of a different length than the pipe. If the hole is longer than the surrounding metal, no extra cost will be incurred to the project owner

3. Industry best practices dictate that the ID (Inside Diameter) of all pipe must not exceed the OD (Outside Diameter) - otherwise the hole will be on the outside of the pipe.

4. All pipe is to be of the very best quality, preferably tubular or pipular.

5. All pipe over 6ft (1.83m) in diameter must have the words "LARGE PIPE" painted on it, so the contractor will not mistake it for small pipe or

6. When spec-ing 90 or 45 degree elbows, be sure to specify the proper clock face ( 3:00 bend etc), to eliminate extra fittings necessary to complete a 9:00 bend” Improper spec-ing will not result in a change order for added footage to the project owner.

7. All pipes shorter than 1/8in (3mm) do not comply to the AWWA, AGA and ASTM standards for pipe. They are generally known as washers.

8. All pipe closers are to be open on one end.

9. All pipe is to be supplied with nothing in the hole so that water, steam, or other stuff can be put inside at a later date.

10. Joints in pipes for water must be water-tight. Those in pipes for compressed air, however, need only be air-tight.

11. All pipe is to be supplied without rust, as this can be more readily put on at the jobsites.

12. No fittings are to be installed on pipe unless specified. If the contractor chooses to install a nonspecified fitting, the pipe alignment will not be straight. Excess installation will not result in a change order for added footage to the project owner.

13. All pipe over 500 feet in length must have the words "Long Pipe" clearly painted on each end so that the fitter will know that it is a long pipe.

14. All pipe over two miles in length must also have these words painted on the middle so that the fitter will not have to walk the full length of the pipe to determine if it is long pipe or not.

15. All pipe over six inches in diameter is to have the words "Large Pipe" painted on it, so that the fitter will not use it for small pipe.

16. All pipe fittings are to be made of the same stuff as the pipe.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Why can't I just make a hole

Alongside a road was a sign that maintained
"boring experts" was there just as plain as day
Now I thought to myself of my own claim to this throne
25 years of trying to just make a hole
It seems so simple, so tried and so true,
....and yet its not!

Now I'm reminded of the bore I don't want to mention
when under a road 4 lanes to be sure 
I left 50 grand in steel under Renton
It seemed so simple to just make a hole.

Or what about crossing Division
4 threes feeding lifeblood of power to the new mall
weaving and bobbing 20 feet below
pressures are rising
and the pipes slow to a crawl
minutes before it seemed so easy
and now it ends without a new hole

Working downtown late at night 
I see people talking to themselves alone
what are they saying, pondering and thinking
could it be that they are burned out 
by too many years of boring... 
instead of drinking?

With all the risks, why do I try?
A casino bet with odds stacked against us
 but half science, half luck and half pray
will carry me through and save the day.

Crossed the Grande Ronde, the Blackfoot and Little Spokane
conquering shots and crossings where no other can
up three rotate two, and straight as an arrow
we are pulling it through.

Making a hole is harder than it seems
geology is against us, so I won't make the claim
 of Boring expert cause it is fleeting and lame

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

The ditch diggers prayer

Lord is my bonding agent, I shall not cry...
In big loud Iron He makes me to ride
I'm rockin and rollin through these long deep ditches,
He restarts my soul
and guides me through my hubs for cut and fill
all for a job well done, on grade and on time.

And Yea, though I walk in the valley of bid opening,
I fear no low prices from my enemies low balling,
For you are with me, and my change orders will come
steel on steel and with loud squeaky rumbling
You prepare my bid to be laid
first on the table
with mumbles and rumbles my enemies subside
for on big Iron with you I ride

surely nothing will break in this hot summer dust
in this cloud of smoke I will put my trust
My heart overflows at the end of a long day
so blessed to be working and making it pay